Excerpted from "thestar". Sunday, 24th September.

" BEFORE the baby came, Cheryl’s life revolved around school, cyber cafes, church and Coffee Bean... Gone are such youthful frivolities since Aaron's birth two years ago. Cheryl, who turned 19 in July...  Like many teenagers, Cheryl had consented to having sex with her boyfriend Vincent... Raw passion fuelled by an overwhelming urge to try what seems so natural and stimulating, soon led to a fragile, burping little being. Conception does not take into account religion, race or social status. The first time can be that time...

Two months later, Cheryl started having nauseous spells. “I knew my body had become different,” she says.  

Cheryl went to a clinic. Her pregnancy was confirmed.  

“I called Vincent and told him, 'Are you ready to be a father? I’m pregnant.' To my surprise, he replied, 'Are you serious? I’m happy! I’m ready to marry you'.”

“It was hell telling my father, though. He took it so personally as though I had shamed the family name. He was working as a contractor in Singapore, and after my mum called him, he drove madly through the night to come home demanding why I had got myself pregnant?”

Vincent and Cheryl married within a month. While their relationship remained as sweet as any young relationship could be, they lived amidst a constant war zone. 

... Both Vincent's and Cheryl’s parents warred relentless; each blaming the other for everything that went wrong. Heated quarrels and shouting matches erupted night after night. Initially the couple lived with Vincent’s family. Frequent visits by Cheryl’s parents led to more fights... They decided to move out to a rented apartment with help from both parents...

“Every time I look at Aaron, I am overcome by thankfulness that I didn’t abort him. How could I have ever thought of killing this beautiful, innocent boy?” said Cheryl.

What was more difficult, she adds, was enduring the condemnation from friends and relatives. Prior to the pregnancy, she was a active youth leader in her local church, involved in various ministries. 

“Many people told me, 'You of all people getting yourself pregnant! You let us down.' I was branded and treated like a black sheep.

“We’re always worried about our finances,” said Cheryl. “We need to pay for our home, babysitter, Aaron’s needs and our car. We don’t go for holidays, just fishing trips to the kelong or pond. Thankfully, I’ve never been a shopaholic! We spend most of our money buying diapers and toys for Aaron.”

“Sometimes I do wonder what could’ve been if I had gone on to college to study bio-chemistry as I’d always wanted. "

(Edited for personal use)
For fulll article visit http://www.thestar.com.my/lifestyle/story.asp?file=/2006/9/24/lifefocus/15515041&sec=lifefocus

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Now, for my personal view.

This may not sound like what you think. Maybe it is because I have always had a heart for this people group.

I can sort of identify with Cheryl's situation. I am human, a youth leader in church, involve in various ministries.

I feel there is much injustice in the situation above. Though I do not consent with the act of pre-marital sex... condemnation, verbal abuse and shame should never be it! It really must be so hurting to have your own father accusing you of shaming the family! Even worst, your own church friends treat you like ....

Should not the church, family of God!! be a comforter and be more LIKE JESUS, who ate with SINNERS, mind you. JESUS NEVER condemn anyone. Why are we doing so? "For there is no condemnation in Christ"

I believe this is what Jesus would do. Something I would... something I have much a burden for. Jesus would have helped this couple. Counseled them yes... but also be there for them, financially, socially, defending them publicly as sons and daughters of God still to be fully love!!! Jesus would have tried to help Cheryl get back her dreams of studying biochem... Jesus would have been there.... I believe the sin they have done is nothing compared to the social stigma we create againts them!

A father should have is arms open to receive his child (like the prodigal son)... not shame him or her. 

But I guess our response should always to be there to support and help this people despite the social dislike...

I mean READ LUKE 18! And see who is justified!!!

The Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector

 9To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: 10"Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11The Pharisee stood up and prayed about^[a] himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'

 13"But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'

 14"I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Excuse my rambling in this situation. But I have always believe that life is about worship and worship is JUSTICE (Joel Houston, Hillsong United) True justice is very much to do with GRACE and MERCY. Ain't we just sinners as bad as anyone else? No one is beter than the other.

"For all have sin and fallen short of the glory of God"

Humbly - an acknowledged sinner reaching for forgiveness,
Judson